My Great Big Beautiful Birthday Bowl

This being the day after Thanksgiving, our local little thrift store had it's annual "Day after Thanksgiving half off sale". Since we were around this year we went to it. It was Grace's idea. Her idea was, that if we went right away when it opened she could buy the huge old bowl that we saw last week for me, for my birthday. We did and she did. And now I have this beautiful huge fruit bowl to replace the three or four at-a-time bowls that I usually have around on my counters. I love it! When I thanked her she told me she'd like to inherit it someday...I had already thought of that.

Going places, thinking up and doing things, homemaking and just living with my daughters (and sons) is such a joy. I never imagined life would be so good, so blessed, so full!

I think this is the first request for inheritance I've had, means I'm getting older...that's what happens with birthdays.

Never regret growing older...it is a privilege denied to many!

Night and Day Care

She just loved little Peter

Sometime in my early twenties, I formed the conviction that day care for children and for the old-- was bunk--that people should take care of their own! I determined to be a stay- at- home- Mom and that as opportunity would arise I would welcome my parents and grands to live with us as well.

My Grandma and I had never been close. I spent two months with her and Grandpa the summer I was 13 but other than that her visits were short and somewhat seldom. She spent her time traveling and with her senior friends.

But, Grandma came to live with us when she was 89 and I was 42, for the last 6 months of her life.

My Mom and my Aunt Carol had been taking care of her for a few years but it was getting hard to leave her at home when she went to work. Grandma wasn't safe, left the water running and things like that. So we offered to have her live with us not thinking she would because we were outspoken Christians and Grandma had given up her faith some 25 years earlier. I didn't think she'd want to risk having us preach to her or trying to "lead her back to the Lord". So, I was shocked when she took us up on the idea. When my Mom called and said she'd be coming to us, Grandma got on the phone and asked in her old lady voice "Are you prepared to take care of me 'til the day I die?" Well, that was the idea. We didn't feel prepared, just willing. We had alot to learn.

  Ruthie pushing her Great Grandma outside

We got her moved and situated in her own room, across the hall from ours. She joined us for meals and took outings on the deck but mostly we visited with her in her room.

A special meal with friends

After some weeks she began to ask questions and make comments about how the family was functioning. How Jeff lead and we followed. How I directed and the children helped and obeyed. How everything seemed to work together and run (pretty) smoothly. She started to enjoy being part of it all.

Three months into our time with her she called to me in the night one night, crying and tossing to and fro from a bad dream. In her dream she was being put into a body bag and thrown out into a corn field. In vain I tried to console her. She asked me to pray for her to have the peace she once knew and I did, but it didn't help, so I urged her to pray for herself. She refused, claiming that there was a black spot in her heart and she could not pray. Finally, I convinced her to pray and ask God to take away the spot and help her... AND HE DID!!! She began exclaiming immediately "I've got it! I've got it again! I've got back the PEACE that I once had!" Following this she began feebly singing the old hymn "Love Lifted Me". When she had sung all she knew she had me sing it too! Once I had sung all I knew she made me bring the hymnal in and sing every verse! Finally, she told me to go to bed, that she'd be alright now, that I needed sleep. But before I left she made me promise to tell Jeff and the children to come into her room first thing in the morning so that she could tell them what had happened. Agreeing to, I left her there singing herself to sleep.

Grandma's prayer

The following day she had me call my Mom and ask her to FedEx her old New Testament to her immediately. And I did. Next day she was clutching it to her breast and crying over it for a quarter of an hour. Then with magnifier in hand she began reading it again and again.

       

Jesus was alive and well and working in her heart. Forgiveness was sought for some of the biddy things she had said and done, and of course it was joyfully given! Thereafter we spent many precious times singing with her and reading to her from God's Word. Romans 8 being her favorite chapter.

We'll never be able to count the blessings we received in that short 6 months with Grandma. We learned lots about elder-care, lots of family history, lots of patience and lots about God. He is faithful to begin the good work He begins in us!

I was sinking deep in sin,
Far from the peaceful shore,
Very deeply stained within,
Sinking to rise no more;
But the master of the sea
Heard my despairing cry,
From the waters lifted me,
Now safe am I.

Love lifted me!
Love lifted me!
When nothing else could help,
Love lifted me....

The Young Mother

   The young Mother set her foot on the path of life. “Is the way long?” she asked. And her guide said “Yes, and the way is hard” “And you will be old before you reach the end of it.  But the end will be better than the beginning.” But the young Mother was happy and she would not believe that anything could be better than these years.  So she played with her children, and gathered flowers for them along the way and bathed with them in the clear streams, and the sun shone on them and life was good, and the young Mother cried, “Nothing will ever be lovelier than this.” 

     Then night came, and the storm, and the path was hard, and the children shook with cold, and the Mother drew them close and covered them with her mantle, and the children said “Oh, Mother, we are not afraid for you are near and no harm can come”. And the Mother said “This is better than the brightness of day, for I have taught my children courage.”

     And morning came, and there was a hill ahead, and the children climbed and grew weary, and the Mother was weary, but at all times she said to the children, “a little patience and we are there.”  So the children climbed, and when they reached the top, they said, “We could not have done it without you, Mother.”  And the Mother, when she lay down that night, looked at the stars and said “This is a better day than the last, for my children have learned fortitude in the face of hardness.  Yesterday, I have them courage, today I have given them strength.”

And the next day came strange clouds which darkened the earth--clouds of war and hate and evil, and the children groped and stumbled, and the Mother said…”Look up. Lift your eyes to the Light.” And the children looked and saw above the clouds and Everlasting Glory and it guided them and brought them beyond the darkness.  And that night the Mother said “This is the best day of all, for I have shown my children God”.

     And the days went on and the weeks and the months, and the years, and the Mother grew older and she was little and bent.  But her children were tall and strong and walked with courage.  And when the way was hard, they helped their Mother and when the way was rough, they lifted her, for she was as light as a feather, and at last they came to a hill and beyond the hill they could see a shining road and golden gate flung wide.

And the Mother said:  “I have reached the end of my journey.  And now I know that the end is better than the beginning, for my children can walk alone and their children after them".  And the children said “You will always walk with us Mother even when you have gone through the gates.”

     And they stood and watched her as she went on alone, and the gates closed after her.  And they said “We cannot see her, but she is with us still.  A Mother like ours is more than a memory, she is a living presence".

I posted this in memory of my dear friend Rhoda who passed away recently. Tomorrow I will attend her funeral/farewell service and give copies of this poem to the three adult children she has left behind.

 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.

 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.

 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.

 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.

taken from Proverbs chapter 31